How Many Mondays Do You Have Left?
- Juad Masters
- May 2
- 7 min read
Updated: May 3
"You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough." — Mae West
How many Mondays do you have left?
This question, posed by Jodi Wellman from Four Thousand Mondays during my last event, has stayed with me. It reminds me of the feeling I get when watching a stressful scene in a movie. Part of me—the emotionally uncomfortable or scared part—wants to shut my eyes, cover my ears, or leave. The other part of me—the curious, more logical side—wants to stay engaged, observing the scene objectively to follow the flow and see what happens next.
The question makes me both uncomfortable and curious at the same time.
The beauty of how Jodi poses this question lies in how she helps us answer it. She doesn’t shy away from its triggering nature—or, dare I say, its morbid tone. Instead, she normalizes the discomfort (or panic!) this personal reflection may cause, then gives us permission, through humor and research-backed insights, to befriend the scary thought and cozy up to it—using what comes from answering it to live like we mean it.
How, you might ask, can contemplating our mortality actually lead to a more meaningful life?
The dichotomy is what carries the brilliance of how counting our Mondays works. It all comes down to the Scarcity Principle. This concept suggests that when resources are limited, they are perceived as more valuable. It applies to various contexts, such as economics—where a shortage of goods drives up demand and value—or, most relevant to our discussion, psychology—where perceived scarcity can increase desire or urgency (Mullainathan & Shafir, 2013; Cialdini, 2006).
Moderation is Key.
To be clear, the idea is not to terrorize ourselves by hyperfocusing on mortality to the point that we become paralyzed with fear, undermining our well-being. Rather, the goal is to acknowledge our finite time, use that awareness as motivation, and empower ourselves to, in Jodi's own words, "pursue living a life we love, staving off the 'coulda, shoulda, woulda' troika of regrets" (Wellman, 2025).
How many times have you been on vacation, and on that last day, you feel compelled to cram everything you didn’t get to do during the entire trip into one final push, making sure you leave with no regrets? In those instances where I've felt something remained undone, I've found myself thinking: What if, instead of assuming I had plenty of days left to visit X or discover Y, I had viewed each day as more finite? What if I had approached each day with a greater sense of urgency?
But here’s the tricky part:
Living with a strong sense of urgency can quickly turn into stress if left unchecked, much like the character of the White Rabbit in Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland (Carroll, 1865), who symbolizes anxiety, societal pressures, and the relentless passage of time. I, for one, don’t want to feel constantly breathless, cramming everything in and affecting my well-being—and the well-being of those around me—because of this looming sense that my time is running out, as though I need to "get it all done right now!" at all costs. I already have enough stressors in my daily life that demand immediate attention without voluntarily having to add yet another one!
So, how can we find that sweet spot—the fulcrum—that helps maintain balance in our well-being when using the extreme, seemingly opposing concept of our inevitable demise to spark vitality while we’re still here, above ground?
To this question, Jodi introduced us to the concept of memento mori, the intentional acknowledgment of our mortality, as a tool to inspire action and purpose, and suggested a few strategies to practice this concept, starting with reflecting on what brings us joy. Jodi encouraged us to think about what we are doing—or not doing, for that matter—when we feel at our best and happiest. Once we identify these sources of joy, we then intentionally seek opportunities to weave them into our lives to live an astonishingly alive life.
Here’s the beauty of this personal reflection: for some, joy might mean being with best friends at a live music concert, while for others, it might be spending time lost in a good book at a quiet café. There’s no right or wrong here. The loud, socially intense first option might be a nightmare for someone who prefers solitude and peace. And our preferences might even shift—sometimes craving that energetic social encounter, other times preferring a quiet evening.
The point is to find what makes you happy, and go do it—even if it’s just a little bit. Treat yourself. Keep in mind, it doesn’t have to be anything grand. For me, for example, one of life’s greatest joys is listening to the sound of rain. Every time it rains, I rush to open a window—even just a tiny crack—or a door, and pause for even a few seconds to listen. Just soak it in.
Living life fully doesn’t equate to doing, doing, doing. It’s about doing what makes us happy, which can absolutely include "not doing," like staying home on the sofa, watching a Netflix show in our jammies, alone.
She then shared another strategy: the gentle practice of noticing impermanence in daily life—paying attention to small moments that remind us of life’s fleeting nature, like a wilting flower, the setting sun, the little bubble that floats in the shower from the shampoo bottle, or buying your child their third pair of shoes in two months because they're growing so quickly! Noticing these mundane, transient experiences can serve as subtle reminders to appreciate the present moment and reinforce the idea that time is precious, nudging us to live with more intention, without the heaviness of focusing directly on death.
Another slightly less gentle, but quite effective, strategy Jodi shared was calculating how many Mondays we have left. Yep, you read that right! See how it’s already effective?! Kind of gives you a little jolt, right? A wake-up call that can send most of us, ever so slightly, into a bit of discomfort… and, inevitably, pique our curiosity (there’s that movie experience I was sharing before!).
But how exactly would we know this? And let’s be honest, I think we can all agree that not knowing is how we’d all prefer to keep it…
What Jodi is suggesting isn’t clairvoyantly knowing the exact details (no thank you!), but using the data to approximate, and with it, get that little kick in the ***—uncomfortable enough to do something about it, but not painful enough to send us spiraling down into the depths of despair.
So, how does this counting-Monday’s strategy actually work?
Jodi explained that, roughly speaking, based on current life expectancy data in the U.S., we have more or less 4,000 Mondays in total in our lives (assuming 80 years), with men averaging 74.8 years and women about 80.2 years (Kochanek et al., 2024). When put like that, in such simple, manageable numbers, to me as a middle-aged woman, it feels both good—ah! There is so much time!—and, at the same time, I feel ever so slightly unnerved by a subtle yet growing sense of urgency—ah! Ok, well, I really want to make the most of my other half!
Down to Mathematics.
To calculate this approximation, she offered a simple-to-use formula:
Step 1: Use the life expectancy numbers shared above for men and women (you can also use the average life expectancy number of 80), and subtract your current age.
Step 2: Multiply the resulting number by 52 weeks per year.
Step 3: Then add a bonus Monday because attending Jodi’s astonishingly amazing salon and reading my recap of it just got you an extra week of life ;)
And there you have it—an approximate number for us to consider: a call for action. Now, it’s up to us to be intentional with that time.
I'll leave you with one final poignant reflection from Jodi that complements the strategies we've explored thus far: a thought-provoking "would you rather..." question. The chart below (which Jodi created herself—yes, she's also an artist!) presents different scenarios combining life length with quality ratings. Which option would you choose when faced with these trade-offs between longevity and life quality?
Now that we have this suite of new strategies, acknowledging there’s always room to grow, we can begin moving forward toward a life with more intention and purpose.
To feel it all, live it all.
The good, the bad, the everything in between—even when it’s not unfolding as we had hoped or planned—life as it is.
And here’s my last little strategy for those of us in the Northeast U.S. right now, where spring has fully sprung: go outside and admire those beautiful pink cherry blossoms...soak it all in. We all know that in just a few days, the flowers will be gone—a perfect, gentle reminder of life’s fleeting nature and our precious time to experience it.
This gift of awareness empowers us to take charge of our well-being by pursuing a zero-regrets life and avoiding slipping into autopilot. So let me ask you: what’s your plan for next Monday?
- / -
Click here to view the recording of my conversation with Jodi Wellman.
References
Cialdini, R. B. (2006). Influence: The psychology of persuasion (Revised ed.). HarperCollins.
Carroll, L. (1865). Alice's adventures in Wonderland. Macmillan.
Kochanek KD, Murphy SL, Xu JQ, Arias E (2024). Mortality in the United States, 2022.
National Center for Health Statistics Data Brief, 492.
Mullainathan, S., & Shafir, E. (2013). Scarcity: Why having too little means so much.
Macmillan.
Wellman, J. (2025, April 29). How many Mondays do you have left? [PowerPoint slides,
Zoom]. In Conversation With | Jodi Wellman Salon. Link.
Wellman, J. (2025, May 1). My mission + the grim reaper. Four Thousand Mondays.
Contact Jodi Wellman @
Website: https://fourthousandmondays.com/
Instagram: @fourthousandmondays
LinkedIn: Four Thousand Mondays
...and I did promise to share her baking website too - here you go. You're welcome ;)
Kommentare